Moll, this is incredible! I’ll say again that your poetry is truly matchless. Call yourself what you will (or won’t), but you an incredible poet is just one of many things you are! I will need to read this many times if I am to afford it the appreciation it deserves. But for now, I want to restack it in hopes that other readers may see this comment, grow curious, read and enjoy such a literary treat. Beautiful, brilliant work, Moll! I couldn’t be more pleased!
It would make a wonderful song actually. And what impressed me is that the rhyming is just about perfect. So many people stumble when they try that —either adding too many syllables or too few, so that the lines sound slightly off. You didn’t. And that’s on top of crafting a beautiful story.
Thank you for this - yes, I wrangled with it a bit like it was a cryptic crossword to get the scanning right! I asked daughter no 2 if she'd be up for putting it to guitar music and maybe even singing (she has a beautiful voice) and she seemed amenable, so fingers crossed...
BTW I didn't thank you properly for your lovely positive response in your other post about me maybe creating a female villainess as dark as your Kinrowan out of Bess. I'm very much into the idea, and chewing it over to figure out what shape it would have.
Sadly I can't take credit for crafting the story of Tristram and Iseult, I stole it straight from medieval myth!
Yes - that’s the hook of the whole legend for me! Iseult of the White Hands (Kai’s sister) was a Disney villainess (which is to say, entirely relatable, but still - oooooh!)
Moll, this is incredible! I’ll say again that your poetry is truly matchless. Call yourself what you will (or won’t), but you an incredible poet is just one of many things you are! I will need to read this many times if I am to afford it the appreciation it deserves. But for now, I want to restack it in hopes that other readers may see this comment, grow curious, read and enjoy such a literary treat. Beautiful, brilliant work, Moll! I couldn’t be more pleased!
So tightly bound, those rose-trees wound
About each other so,
As if their limbs were lovers’ limbs
That never should let go,
As if those rose-trees knew a love
No fate could overthrow.
What a lovely first poem post, dear Moll!
I love how you've got the ballard structure working perfectly.
The rhyming gives the piece a really strong storytelling flow in a medieval way and does it beautifully.
Your closing image of rose trees entwined over graves is particularly fitting for the legend.
For your first posted poem, this is awesome and makes me wonder what else you're keeping hidden in your desk drawers!
This is so so very beautiful! 🌹🌹
Truly stunning Moll.
You've created such a wonderful poem here.
I'm travelling all day today so will reply earnest, my dearest Moll, and wanted to let you know this is not missed 💛
This is so lovely. It's hard to maintain poetic form for a long piece like that and you do it beautifully. Sad and brave and tender. Write more.
Thank you @Jean McKinney for seeing the blood sweat and tears I lost over this 😉🤗
It would make a wonderful song actually. And what impressed me is that the rhyming is just about perfect. So many people stumble when they try that —either adding too many syllables or too few, so that the lines sound slightly off. You didn’t. And that’s on top of crafting a beautiful story.
Thank you for this - yes, I wrangled with it a bit like it was a cryptic crossword to get the scanning right! I asked daughter no 2 if she'd be up for putting it to guitar music and maybe even singing (she has a beautiful voice) and she seemed amenable, so fingers crossed...
BTW I didn't thank you properly for your lovely positive response in your other post about me maybe creating a female villainess as dark as your Kinrowan out of Bess. I'm very much into the idea, and chewing it over to figure out what shape it would have.
Sadly I can't take credit for crafting the story of Tristram and Iseult, I stole it straight from medieval myth!
Turning Bess into a dark character sounds fascinating. That is a story that's never been told and it could be wonderful. Please please give it a try!
And maybe the Tristan/Iseult story has been told many times, but not in the way you did. I'm still amazed at how that turned out.
You are always so kind and encouraging! This week has kicked my behind, but I’m definitely keen to have a dark Bess!
I hate weeks like that! I hope things settle down for you -- the world does need a dark Bess, I think.
This poem touches all of my pieces and parts!!!! I am swallowing it bit by bit to enjoy every single word. You are an insane poet. Love this!
This was your first poem? You did a fantastic job!
First I’ve been brave enough to post!
Thank you so much! Xxx
There is a poetry setting in the “more” tab of your Substack editor, but I liked how you overcame that with the little moon and star dividers!
Thanks, but they’re a bit clunky - I want to find a widget like the squiggle old playbills have
The black sails lie, oh no.... That one hurt in the exact worst way...
Yes - that’s the hook of the whole legend for me! Iseult of the White Hands (Kai’s sister) was a Disney villainess (which is to say, entirely relatable, but still - oooooh!)
Fantastic, Moll!